How to Stay Sinngle

~this is a poem I wrote as a teen girl who was still very confused about boys and relationships.  Its a silly, humorous piece that was lots of fun to write.  I hope you like it~

First off
Try to always avoid boys
If they try talking to you
Be sure to look bored and pissed off
The best way to steer clear of conversation
Is to simply not reply

Wear mostly sweatshirts
And show as little skin as possible
If necessary, don't brush your hair
Leave little tangles at the end to say:
Stay away, I'm wild!

Try to miss any event
Where hormonal boys will be abundant
If you find yourself in an unintended public situation
Be sure you're with people who are generally
more attractive to the male species
"Forgetting" to shave your legs is always helpful

Do not listen to love songs!
Do not talk about him with your friends!
Do not think about his hands running over
his soft hair!
Just sit in your peaceful boy-free room
And read Edgar Allen Poe or something